When I found
out I was pregnant with Allison, everyone I knew (me included) was a bit
stunned; no one moreso than her big brothers. Alex says, “When you told me, I
think I sharted,” spoken like a true 14 year-old! Her big sister was the only
person not in shock – she was thrilled from the get-go.
My worry was
about how these siblings would relate to one another. Would they even know each other? All of the big kids
would be out of the house by the time Allison was four years old. She was three
when Adam joined the Army. My sister, Kristi, and her family came to visit
right around that time to help us move into our new home. When they left,
Allison was staring forlornly out the patio door. She asked if her cousins,
Payton and Mitchell, had to go to the Army, too. Suddenly, everyone who left us
for an extended period was going to the Army.
Like siblings
who are closer in age, I still yell about fighting in the back seat of the car.
I encourage fair play and I advocate for the younger one getting to go along
sometimes. But, for the most part, the big kids and their friends include her.
She goes golfing (miniature and driving range), they watch movies with her,
teach her how to play video games, play hide and seek and shoot off fireworks
with her. They handle (sometimes even appropriately) discussions about how to
deal with bullies…they encourage her to ride her bike without training wheels…to
try again when she’s discouraged about missing a baseball with her bat again
and again.
At dinner,
when the big kids are telling some animated story or another, they will use watered-down
versions of bad language because of her presence – like “crap” or “shoot.”
Allison will still put on my Mom-voice and exclaim, “Adam! Language.” Which just cracks
everyone up… Of course, there are other times, when they don’t think she’s
listening and absorbing everything they say, that they use actual bad language.
This has resulted in some uncomfortable conversations for her Mom and Dad with
both the bus driver and the Principal!
It’s been
yet another lesson in life that everything works out as it’s intended. They are
brothers and sisters, regardless of their ages, in a patchwork family Rich and
I were lucky enough to bring together. They have taught me as much about love,
adoration and loyalty as I had intended to share with them. It warms a mother's heart.
